It’s usually better to handle matters through conversation than through writing. And when possible, it’s better to use a mediator rather than dealing directly yourself. Letters are useful when you want a written reply or when you may need to produce them later to justify your actions. They’re also useful if there’s a risk of being interrupted or overheard. Face-to-face discussions work best when your presence commands respect—this is often the case with those below you in status—or when you need to read the other person’s expressions to gauge how far you can push. Speaking in person also allows you the freedom to deny or clarify what you’ve said later, if needed.
When choosing someone to act on your behalf, pick straightforward people who will faithfully carry out the task and report back accurately. Avoid those who twist situations to make themselves look good or exaggerate reports to make themselves look good. Also, choose people who care about the task—they’ll be more motivated—and match their abilities to the job. For instance, bold individuals are good for confrontations, persuasive people excel in negotiations, crafty types are useful for gathering information, and even stubborn or peculiar people have their uses in situations that require persistence.
It’s wise to use people who’ve been successful in similar tasks before, as this builds confidence in their abilities, both for you and for them. Success is a habit, and they’ll want to maintain their reputation.
When dealing with someone, it’s often better to approach matters indirectly at first rather than jumping straight to the point—unless your goal is to catch them off guard with a direct question. People who are hungry for something are usually easier to work with than those who are already satisfied.
If you’re negotiating terms, the party who takes the first step usually holds the advantage. You can’t expect someone to act first unless it’s part of the agreement, you’ve made them believe they’ll need your help later, or they trust you because you have a reputation for being honest.
All dealings come down to two things: understanding or influencing. People reveal their true intentions when they trust you, when they’re emotional, when they’re caught off guard, or when they’re desperate to get something done and can’t find a good excuse.
If you want to influence someone, you must understand them. Learn their nature and habits so you can guide them, learn their goals to persuade them, or their weaknesses to intimidate them. You can also influence them by leveraging those they trust or depend on.
When dealing with cunning individuals, always keep their ultimate goals in mind. Their words often have hidden meanings, so interpret them carefully. It’s best to say little to such people and surprise them with what you do say.
In complex negotiations, don’t expect immediate results. You can’t sow seeds and harvest them on the same day. Take your time, prepare carefully, and let things develop step by step.
Bacon Blueprint 